This is called “hiding behind your devices.” It’s easy to do, when you don’t want to answer an email or text or have a tough talk on the phone or in-person.
Don’t hide. Just say, “No.”
For example, say,
“No, we’re not going to be hiring you. Thanks for applying. And good luck.”“No, we didn’t accept your proposal. Thank you for submitting it.”Or, in the on-line dating world, “No, it doesn’t seem like it’s going to work out for us to date. Take care.”
It’s hard to say, and you can try to soften the blow, but when most people hear “no,” they move on. And so can you.
The benefit? It frees up your mental energy and paves the way for everybody to move forward.
It may not seem nice, to say, “No,” but what’s really not nice is stringing people along giving them hope that you’ll say, “Yes,” to whatever they’re asking.
The New Nice is being direct. It shows courage, compassion and confidence.
For instance, say,
“No thank you. I’m not able to come to your event. I hope it’s a great success.”“No, thank you, I have specific charities that I support, so I’m not able to give to yours. Good luck.”
For the next 30-days, practice, “Just saying, “No.”
And if you’re on the other end, where you want an answer, simply say, “Yes and No are both good answers.”
Try:
I hope you can attend our event. Yes and No are both good answers.Have you filled the job? Yes and No are both good answers.Would you like to go out again? Yes and No are both good answers.
You’ll be amazed at how fast people will respond if they know they have an “out,” because you’ve given them permission to, “Just say No.”