Courage vs. Confidence
- Tracy Hooper
- Apr 2
- 3 min read
Last month, Henry and I were in Sedona, Arizona, visiting Henry’s college roommate and hiking the beautiful Red Rock trails.
We did Cockscomb the first day about 8 miles with some slight elevation. Look at those views! The last day, we hiked Bell Rock. Check out those views. In between, Cathedral Rock. More elevation and more magnificent views.
Our daughter, Kathleen, had recently hiked Cathedral. And she said, “Mom, near the top it gets steep, and then narrow, and there’s a crevice. But if you take your time, you can do it.” Steep, narrow, and crevice. Those words stuck in my head. Anyway, halfway up the trail, we passed a very slight, older man.
“Enjoy the view,” he said.
“Oh, do you live here?”
“Yeah, for years.”
“So you’ve hiked Cathedral?”
“A thousand times!”
“A thousand times?!”
“Yup! And I’m 88 years old! You can do it, girl. Don’t be scared. It’s all right here.Be courageous.”
I thought, “Well, if he can do it, I can do it.”
But as we climbed, the trail got steeper, and then narrower, then there was some hand-over-hand climbing. And that was before the crevice! And suddenly I thought, “I don’t want to do this.”
It was funny because I had just read one of those “motivational messages” that says, “Do something every day that scares you.” And I remember thinking, “I don’t want to do something every day that scares me. I want to protect my nervous system.”
PS-- a couple of years ago, I slipped on ice and broke my wrist. And since then, I am highly motivated to stay upright.
The guys were great. They said, “No pressure. Enjoy the view. We’ll see you in an hour. So, I stopped, and took in the red rocks and I decided, “This is high enough for me.”
And I pondered, “What’s the difference between courage & confidence?”
A couple of days after we got home, I had coffee with a woman I really admire. She’s a highly respected executive, very involved in the community, and makes big decisions regularly. When I described my “hiking dilemma,” she said, “You know, Tracy, part of being confident is knowing when to say, ‘no.’ Not pushing yourself to prove something. Not doing something every day that scares you. Confidence is knowing yourself well enough to decide what’s right for you.”
Her comment clarified something I’d been thinking about since that hike. Courage isn’t just physical. Courage is speaking up when you disagree. It’s starting a business. It’s having a difficult conversation. It’s saying, ‘I’m sorry’ when you know you’ve made a mistake.
Courage is often the first step. But Confidence grows from taking that step and the one after that. Confidence is a verb. You know, take action. Make mistakes. Adjust, refine and repeat. And confidence also means wisdom. Knowing your limits. Knowing what’s right for you. Sometimes courage says, “Keep climbing.” Sometimes confidence says, “This is high enough for me.”
So, for the next 30 days, pay attention to the moments when you’re deciding whether to push forward or pause. Ask yourself, “Where is courage calling me to step-up? And where is confidence giving me permission to say, ‘This is high enough?’”
Real Confidence isn’t about proving something. It’s about knowing yourself well enough to choose wisely.
Thank you for reading.
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